Apologize, Repent, and Reform

 
 
 

One of the systems designed by God Almighty to purify the souls of believers – and ultimately to redeem them - is continuous repentance. God has instructed us to use this divine system for our own benefit while we are still on earth. Repentance is a process which is always preceded by a basic step. We first have to acknowledge our sin and apologize to God - this is how we express remorse.  It is an honest guilty plea to God almighty, followed by asking Him to forgive that sin for us. Then we consciously repent, which means we make a promise to God that we will not repeat the same sin. The final step to follow is active reform. Reform is our chance to fulfill our promise and prove to God almighty that we have made a firm repentance.

The Quran clearly states that God forgives all sins as long as we follow these three basic steps - implore Him for His forgiveness (apology), repent to Him, then fulfill the promise by reforming. Going back to the same sin after repenting would nullify the repentace and indicate our failure to reform. On the other hand, being firm in our repentance means that we have succeeded, by the will of God, to reform. Repentance is an exclusive trait of true believers. God is Most Gracious, Most Merciful, and He rewards those who repent by transforming their sins into credits:  

[11:3]  "You SHALL seek your Lord's forgiveness, THEN repent to Him. He will then bless you generously for a predetermined period, and bestow His grace upon those who deserve it. If you turn away, then I fear for you the retribution of an awesome day."
 
[4:146]  Only those who REPENT, REFORM, HOLD FAST to GOD, and DEVOTE their religion absolutely to GOD alone, will be counted with the believers. GOD will bless the believers with a great recompense.
 
     God's Infinite Mercy
[39:53]  Proclaim: "O My servants who exceeded the limits, never despair of God's mercy. For GOD forgives all sins. He is the Forgiver, Most Merciful."
 
     The Believers Repent
[66:8]  O you who believe, you SHALL repent to GOD a firm repentance. Your Lord will then remit your sins and admit you into gardens with flowing streams. On that day, GOD will not disappoint the prophet and those who believed with him. Their light will radiate in front of them and to their right. They will say, "Our Lord, perfect our light for us, and forgive us; You are Omnipotent."
 
[25:70]  Exempted are those who repent, believe, and lead a righteous life. GOD transforms their sins into credits. GOD is Forgiver, Most Merciful.
 
The steps of repentance are to be taken during our time on earth. Once we leave this life, our records are final and we can’t edit them. We are then redeemed, doomed, or we await God's mercy in Purgatory.

The system of repentance is clearly detailed in the Quran so we can learn how to correct situations when we have transgressed against others in addition to God and His laws. In such cases, damage may extend beyond our own souls to others – whether individually or on a larger public level. These three steps teach us what is acceptable behavior to God, and also the best way to deal with others we have harmed.  They offer a healthy remedy for all the harmful consequences of our transgression. Once we recognize our transgressions and become sincerely remorseful, we apologize to those we’ve harmed by admitting our wrong actions or words.  We explain that we are committed to never repeating such wrongs. Then we offer a way to fix any damage that we have caused and strive to keep our pledge to never commit those wrongs again. God educates us in the Quran with these three basic procedures to achieve peace and redemption for our souls: 1) apologize - ask for forgiveness,  2) repent - promise to never do it again , and 3) reform - keep our promise and repair whatever damage we can. We apply this civilized and healthy formula, prescribed by God, as a matter of course whenever we have transgressed against others. There are multiple benefits including peace and closure for those involved, emotional healing, and spiritual growth. We can also be confident when we follow this process, it is pleasing to God.

The Quran contains examples which show how important it is strive to repair any public damage resulting from our sins, and associate these same three steps with concealment of the truth. The public harm from concealing the truth includes misleading others, a consequence which God warns us warrants severe punishment . Therefore, while following the three basic steps to redeem our souls, we must deal with the public consequences by acknowledging our transgression, fixing the damage, admitting and proclaiming the truth.

      Gross Offense
[2:159]  Those who conceal our revelations and guidance, after proclaiming them for the people in the scripture, are condemned by GOD; they are condemned by all the condemners.
[2:160]  As for those who REPENT, REFORM, and PROCLAIM, I redeem them. I am the Redeemer, Most Merciful.

Another example that proves the validity of these three basic steps in achieving peace is set in 49:9-10. Peace cannot be achieved between disputing parties as dictated in 49:10 until justice is achieved by correcting the corrupted actions of the aggressing party and compensating the injured party. Being equitable and just towards our souls and others is the essence behind our apology, repentance, and reform. These procedures are the only acceptable path we are given to redeem our souls and end our disputes with others in a healthy fashion and based on God's recommendations:

          Reconcile The Believers

[49:9]  If two groups of believers fought with each other, you shall reconcile them. If one group aggresses against the other, you shall fight the aggressing group until they submit to GOD's command. Once they submit, you shall reconcile the two groups equitably. You shall maintain justice; GOD loves those who are just.
[49:10]  The believers are members of one family; you shall keep the peace within your family and reverence GOD, that you may attain mercy.

Out of ignorance, some confuse an apology with repentance. There is NO excuse for that once we have received our guidance through the Quran. We know that God doesn't run out of words and that He chose every word and letter in the Quran for a purpose. He has chosen two distinct words for these two separate actions. One is "repentance" or "tawbah" in Arabic and the other is "eatethar," used with several derivatives of the same root for apology. God doesn’t mix these two steps. He doesn't err. We must offer our apologies  before we repent to God and before we promise others to reform (11:30). The following verses are about apology, not repentance:

[66:7]  O you who disbelieved, do not apologize today. You are being requited only for what you did.
 
[77:34]  Woe on that day to the rejectors.
[77:35]  That is the day they do not speak.
[77:36]  Nor are they given permission to apologize.
 
[40:52]  On that day, the apologies of the disbelievers will not benefit them. They have incurred condemnation; they have incurred the worst destiny.

In conclusion, apology is a basic first step in dealing with our transgressions whether they are against God or others. Repentance and reform should always follow that basic first step. We must apologize before we promise God and/or others not to repeat the same transgression. God has taught us this formula and it is the healthiest way to have a closure for disputes, relieve pain, and end guilt. Peace and the ultimate redemption of our souls are achievable goals when we utilize this divine system whenever we sin. 

NO apologies will be accepted on the Day of Judgment. On that Day, we can’t make up any thing we have failed to complete on earth, including apologies to God or to others. It will be too late to repent, and we will not have any more chances to reform. This is why it is far better for our souls to deal with our transgressions during this life, before we miss the chance and die with our loads of guilt, pain, shame, regret, and remorse. One of the attributes for the Day of Judgment is being the Day of Remorse. Remorse is an awful and intolerable feeling that would torture the guilty ones who couldn't overcome their egos to apologize, and repent for their transgressions on earth. 

[19:39]  Warn them about the Day of Remorse, when judgment will be issued. They are totally oblivious; they do not believe.
 
[25:14]  You will not declare just a single remorse, on that day; you will suffer through a great number of remorses.
 
[30:57]  Therefore, no apology, on that day, will benefit the transgressors, nor will they be excused.
 

Peaceful Friday, salaam, and God bless.

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